“How can I meet a nice man?”
This is one of the most frequently asked questions I get when speaking to women on the radio, on TV, in public – everywhere.
Finding a Nice Man is Harder than It Seems
To begin, countless women don’t realize that they aren’t very likely to meet someone by hanging out with their friends and family or sitting in front of the TV at home. It takes a lot more effort.
I hear, “It shouldn’t be that hard,” from many women about this situation. Maybe that’s true. But remember that finding a good relationship is worth the work involved. It’s the dating process itself that helps you get to know someone.
Don’t underestimate the importance of the dating process. Depending on how things go, it can set the stage for your future relationship or end it quickly. It is how you figure out whether he’s a nice man who wants what you want or he isn’t. And no, you can’t usually tell these things in a date or two. So learn to listen to your instincts and intuition so that you can better tell the nice men from the ones who’ll break your heart.
5 Go-To Ways to Meet Mr. Right
Here are some suggestions for ways to meet nice men. All of these won’t work for everyone – make sure to choose the methods that are right for your situation.
1. Consider going on blind dates.
Can your friends fix you up? Let your friends know that you’re looking to meet any nice, eligible men that they see as a good match. Friends are good sources for men because they are already semi-vetted – if he is the friend of your friend, he is probably a decent guy, if not your life partner.
2. Socialize through common interests.
Do you go to church, play a sport, or have hobbies where you can meet someone? Whether it’s the gym, classes, volunteering, or something else, wherever you spend your free time can be a great place to meet someone who shares some of your interests. Better still, if you don’t meet anyone, at least you spent your time doing something you like.
3. Throw a party or just go to one!
You can have a party and encourage your guests to bring their single friends. A popular idea is to have a party where each of your female friends brings a single man to introduce to her other friends. You will hopefully meet some nice men at these singles parties, but beware that some of the men that attend will inevitably just be looking for a hookup. Some weeding out of the men will probably be necessary if you want to find someone looking for a serious relationship. The same guidelines apply when attending a friend’s party.
4. Meet people through your job (though maybe not at your place of work).
Dating a man at your current place of work can be tricky. Don’t even consider it if there could be any legal issues (like either you or him being accused of harassment). If you can’t help yourself, it’s safer to date someone at your level or in a different department rather than your boss.
Luckily, there are several ways of finding a match who doesn’t actually work with you. Depending on the size of the company you work for, mingle with men in other departments, offices, or locations of your employer; attend a conference, seminar, or class for your job; join networks or clubs that allow you to socialize with your colleagues at other companies. Because of the unique problems dating at work could cause, be even more cautious than usual. Can you imagine how unpleasant it would be to see the man who broke your heart at work every day?
5. Look online, with a plan in mind.
Online dating works, or at least it has worked for 5% of committed couples. If you still hesitate to look online for a man even after reading that statistic, you’re not alone. But times are slowly changing: now 25% of Americans say it’s okay to date online. It is a little more complicated than meeting a man at your bank, though. A third of the people using these sites never even go on a date with someone they found on there. Learning how to play the online dating game before jumping in will save you a lot of time and energy. Before diving in, you may want to read up on the 5 secrets to online dating and some of the pitfalls and even the dangers you may encounter in the process.
What Is the Right Way for You?
These methods of meeting a man have worked for lots of women. Your biggest challenge is to figure out which ways are right for you. In reality, what’s most important is enjoying the dating process and learning how to figure out if he’s not just a nice man, but the right man for you.
A good way to see the dating process is as a journey of self-exploration. Why? Because the clearer you are about who you are and what you’re looking for, the easier it is to find the right guy. It all starts with understanding yourself. That is precisely how you Be Your Own Brand of Sexy!
Want to take your love life to a whole new level? Then read my book Be Your Own Brand of Sexy: A New Sexual Revolution for Women. Become your own Brand of Sexy with the support and sisterhood of our community here and on Facebook.
