The stigma of online dating is gone. In fact, dating is now the most popular way couples meet. Research from Stanford University found that in 2017, 39% of couples met online, up from 22% in 2009. The numbers are probably even higher since COVID has kept us socially distant.
Stanford sociologist Michael Rosenberg says that online dating has displaced relying on your friends to fix you up.
If you’re hesitant to try it, maybe it’s time to ask yourself why.
If you’ve already tried online dating but had less than optimal results, maybe your profile is part of the problem.
You don’t have to be a great writer or creative genius to create a profile that will attract good men to contact you.
But there are some important tips that you should follow if you want to put your best foot forward online:
1- Be Positive
Too many online profiles include lots of negativity which is exactly what you want to avoid if you want to meet a great guy. Of course, you may want to make it clear that you aren’t looking for a hookup or a workaholic, but it’s better to focus on what you are looking for so they can tell if they meet your criteria.
Don’t include information about what you don’t want like, “No losers or liars or cheaters.” This approach just screams to anyone reading your profile that you’ve had bad experiences with men in the past and that you aren’t over them yet. Eventually, when you get close to a new man, confiding your past love problems is fine, but you don’t want to lead with them. You will never get a second chance to make a good first impression.
2- Include the Basics
Start with a few sentences that tell them who you are. It isn’t easy to describe your entire persona in just a few words, but you can include basic characteristics that describe your personality. Ask your friends for help if you need it. If you can include some details to create a visual image, that’s even better. Also include information about what is important to you in life and the kind of man you’re seeking. Don’t narrow your options by using specifics like “athletic build” and “advanced degrees.”
Here’s an example to give you an idea of a good description:
“I’m a sassy Southern Belle who makes a killer pecan pie. I love cooking, running, traveling, and entertaining friends and family. Looking for a playful, kind, successful, and communicative man who can make me laugh.”
3- Choose the Photos Carefully
Use the photos that capture you in a way that you like. Ideally, you like the way you look in them and you liked the way you felt when they were taken.
Don’t use photos that don’t look like you. Not only do you risk rejection because you don’t look the way you advertised, but doing a bait and switch doesn’t make a good impression. He’ll wonder what else you aren’t being honest about. It’s OK if you’ve gained a few pounds. Just use a more recent photo so you meet men who are OK with your current weight.
Talking about honesty, let’s move to the next point on our list.
4- Be Honest
If the dating site asks questions to match you with people, you’ll probably end up with better matches if you’re truthful. It’s OK if you find some questions too personal and don’t want to answer. A little bit of mystery can leave them wanting more if they’re interested in you.
5- Get Feedback
Writing a good profile is not a walk in the park. There’s nothing wrong with getting some constructive criticism to help you make it better. Asking some friends to look it over can give you a different perspective. For starters, they haven’t agonized over writing it and, who knows, maybe they can even make it more fun and playful.
Is it highlighting your best traits? Your friend is likely to come up with things to include in your profile that you forgot all about! Are you capturing the real you and attracting who you want to date?
You can also consider paying someone to write your profile for you. Some of the online dating providers offer this service to you if you really don’t want to do it yourself.
Most importantly, be optimistic about the possibilities of meeting someone wonderful. It might take some time and you may meet and kiss a lot of frogs along the way, but look at it as a great opportunity to practice your dating and flirting skills. It can get a lot easier to make better choices when you meet a variety of men and understand better what your options are.
Over to You
Are you ready to move forward with a new dating profile or to revise your old one? The best way to begin to online date these days is with video chat dating by a dating coaching for women over 40.
Get my free guide, How to Make a Good First Impression Video Chat Dating to find out how to start dating right NOW!
What are your next steps going to be? Leave me a comment below. I’d love to hear from you.
