A healthy sense of self-worth can help you in every area of your life from friendships to work and especially in your relationships. A confident woman believes that she deserves the best. She understands that someone else can’t make her happy—they can only enhance the happiness she already feels. Try to think of it like this: you can only accept as much love as you feel. A high sense of self-worth won’t solve every problem, but it will equip you to better deal with the blows life inevitably throws each of us at some point.
For the past few weeks we’ve discussed what can cause a low sense of self-worth and steps you can take to improve how you view yourself.
What healthy self-esteem looks like:
She knows some relationships just don’t work out. While each guy you date has that possibility of being the right guy for you, they also hold the possibility of… not. When you have high-self esteem, you know that some things just don’t end “happily ever after”, and it’s because of circumstance, personalities, or timing If it doesn’t work out—he’s a meat eater and you’re a vegetarian, or he’s a workaholic and you prefer more together-time—you know that you just didn’t make the right match this time. You won’t automatically assume you’ve fallen short.
She can set boundaries. You can do what’s best for you rather than sacrifice for the sake of keeping a man. If you don’t want him constantly at your place, you can say you need some space. If you love watching hockey and he doesn’t, you know you don’t have to give it up just to make him happy. If you’re not ready for sex, you know you don’t have to jump into the sack to please him. Do you struggle with saying “no”? Take this quiz to find out.
She accepts herself—”flaws” and all. None of us are perfect. But there’s a difference in telling yourself you should try something different to get a better result versus berating yourself for being a failure. You’ve also come to the realization that the messages media and culture put on women are often unreasonable or impossible to achieve, and that’s okay. You’re the only You there is, and you’ve come to a place where you like and accept yourself and what you’re achieving. You recognize that you’ll have good or bad days, but those good or bad days don’t define your future.
She listens to her own voice. If you know you don’t like casual sex, for example, you won’t feel pressured to “give in” after a date or two just to keep a guy around. You know you’re worth waiting for. You can vocalize this to men when they make suggestions to take things further. You know what you want out of life and relationships, and you’re willing to wait for a man who fits your values.
She knows when to move on. If you’re not being valued, listened to, respected or appreciated, you know when to speak up and let him know how you feel. You also know that after you’ve plainly stated your expectations and he refuses to listen to you that he’s not the right guy and it’s okay to move on.
You also know there are plenty of fish in the sea. Why flounder when you can wait for the perfect catch?
Learning to love yourself might not be easy. With modern day pressures on women to look and act a specific way, at some point we‘ve all believed ourselves to have fallen short of this imaginary idea of “perfection”. It can be difficult for us to turn off those negative voices in our heads telling us all we’re wrong. However, this is an effort that will pay off, if you’re willing to put in the work. You have value. You are important. You are worthy of love and a happy future.
Is 2017 the year you decide you’re worth the effort? This can be the year when you learn what your own Brand of Sexy is—when you let yourself have the relationships you want and the man you deserve.
Are you being your own Brand of Sexy? Click here find out. Click here for a FREE excerpt of my award-winning book, Be Your Own Brand Of Sexy: A New Sexual Revolution For Women. In this book, you’ll learn how to identify patterns of behavior that may have kept you from the future you’ve dreamed of having. You’ll start recognizing your own voice and how to empower yourself to expect better behavior from the men in your life.
Join the hundreds of women making the decision to love themselves and discover their own Brand of Sexy here and on Facebook. You can do this!