Protect your love life from this bad dating advice.


If you’ve been looking for love, chances are you’ve heard some real zingers about dating from the self-help gurus. And if you’re like most women, you’ve probably asked your friends for advice too. In many cases, the information is contradictory. Even when someone wants to help you, they won’t always know what’s best for you when it comes to dating and finding love.  

Everyone is different. When it comes to relationships, two peoples’ values, experiences, and emotions are the biggest factors steering the relationship and making it a success or a failure. It’s almost impossible to boil these highly individualized things down into a formulaic piece of advice that is going to work for everyone. What worked for your best friend might not work for you. But unfortunately, the stakes are high when it comes to bad dating advice. 

The wrong dating and relationship advice can do a lot of damage to your self-esteem and your chances of finding Mr. Right. If you’re unsure of yourself, you can be tempted to trust the advice of someone who seems to know what they’re talking about. But it’s important to remember that there can be different ways to approach dating and you have to figure out what’s going to work for you, as an individual. That’s what Being Your Own Brand of Sexy is all about.  

While it’s okay to solicit advice and listen to different ideas, you need to think about your options and weigh the pros and cons before you act. You’re the one who has to live with the consequences, after all.  

But, there are some kinds of dating advice that you should never listen to, no matter what type of expert is giving them. So what are the top five worst examples of dating advice out there? 

  1. The Three-date Rule

This rule tells women that they must decide in three dates whether to have sex with a new man. This rule is toxic to women. You need time to figure out if you can trust a man, and there is no way you can figure that out after just three dates. Also, you risk getting attached after having sex, and this leaves you vulnerable to trusting an untrustworthy man.  

Protect your heart. If you tell him you aren’t ready to have sex yet and he disappears, then he wasn’t into you enough to make the relationship work and take it to the next level.  

  1. Lying in your dating profile is okay.  

Some people will tell you that it’s all right to lie in your online dating profile because, well, everybody is doing it. Or they might even tell you that it’s reasonable to excuse lying by saying that you have to lie to get people even to give your profile a second look.   

Why doesn’t this work? Because if you’re looking for a solid relationship, your honesty and integrity are what your future partner is evaluating. If you begin with a small lie, Mr. Right will be concerned that you will lie about bigger things, too. The truth is, you’ll never get a second chance to make a first impression. Don’t post photos that are ten years old, or when you were ten pounds lighter. When he eventually sees you in person, he will feel tricked or lied to.  

  1. You must feel a spark, or else it isn’t meant to be. 

 You may have heard that you need instant chemistry or the relationship is doomed to failure. But, couples connect in different ways. People often start as friends, and the spark happens over time with familiarity and bonding. Give the relationship a chance.  

  1. Don’t worry. Someone will come along. 

When people say this, they’re usually just trying to be reassuring and supportive. But this advice can feel dismissive of your concerns. Don’t just wait and hope for the best. When it comes to love, it helps to be proactive.  

  1. Just be yourself. 

I’m all for being the real you. But that doesn’t mean that it’s okay to be inconsiderate of your date or to get involved with a man who won’t ever make you happy. What works in the dating world is Being Your Own Brand of Sexy.  

Being Your Own Brand of Sexy means figuring what works in the dating world for you. When you’re Your Own Brand of Sexy, you’ll know what you want and what types of dating strategies work for you as an individual, and the steps you’ll need to take to achieve your personal relationship goals.  

Being Your Own Brand of Sexy in 5 Simple Steps is an online dating course designed to help you figure out what you want to get out of dating and relationships. The course will teach you in 5 easy steps how to be true to yourself while you look for Mr. Right. You’ll sharpen your instincts and intuition, so you’ll know without a doubt if your date is the right man for you.  

Are you ready to take the guesswork out of dating and finally know, without a doubt, how to get what you want from men? Sign up for the Being Your Own Brand of Sexy in 5 Simple Steps waiting list. The course is almost ready to launch, and you’ll be the first to know the second it goes live.  

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  • Sandra says:

    I’ve been told that I needed to loose weight. Change my hair color. Go to clubs have a drink and dit st the bar is where guys notice you more. You’ll have to settle for second best since you are not good enough for the highest quality of men. You’re to stuck up is why you don’t have a good man in your life. My problem is I’ve got people who are up my butt sll the time to take care of and who do everything they can to make me look bad to the guy that I’m trying to start a relationship with. My mom has to hug and kiss everytime that she gets close to them which makes them feel uncomfortable and I try to talk to her about it but she tells the guy that I was mean to her about and then he starts backing away from me until she’s go him fully gone
    She says that she should meet them first before I start dating them to see if she likes their looks. I’ve had it with all the crap and I just want to get into a good relationship with the guy I’ve been talking to and stay away from all of my family. Got any advice for this mess?

    • Dr. Susan says:

      Hi Sandra,

      Nice to hear from you. It sounds like you are getting a lot of harmful advice.

      Don’t listen to these people who are so critical of you. They may not truly want you to find a good relationship.

      You don’t have to introduce these men to your family. It’s probably a good idea to wait to meet your family until he’s serious about you and you’ve met his family.

      Please let us know how it goes with you.

      Dr. Susan

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