Unhappy With Your Body? You’re Not Alone.


Do you ever look at yourself in the mirror and wish something was different? Maybe you want thinner thighs, a bigger chest, or a smaller waist.  If any of these thoughts sound familiar, you aren’t alone. A shocking number of women are unhappy with their bodies.

Studies show that up to 91% of women are unhappy with their bodies.

The numbers may vary, but the message is clear – women in America don’t like the way they look.

So what can we do about it?

1.    Remember that even models don’t have perfect faces or bodies. It’s well known that the photographs in magazines are altered. Pictures are “retouched” to define cheekbones, smooth out skin, remove fat, and lengthen limbs—to name a few. So the next time you look in the mirror and feel disappointed because your waist line isn’t as defined as a magazine model’s, remember that her waist line probably isn’t that defined, either.

2.    Focus on being healthy. Find activities that you enjoy, like yoga, biking, or hiking. Eat fresh, unprocessed foods. Have fun cooking dinner with a friend instead of going out to eat. Habits like these can be great ways to boost your energy, improve your mood, make new friends, and feel better about yourself – regardless of your jean size.

3.    Realize that you’re probably wrong about what men want. Studies show that women believe men prefer skinnier women than they actually do. Not only do most men not want you to be as thin as most fashion models, but there are men out there who are attracted to women with all different body shapes. Why focus on one image that one group of guys may like? Do you really want to be with a guy who needs you to be a size 2? If you connect in a meaningful way with a guy, chances are he’ll care less about your waist size than you do.

4.    Support your sisters. Women tend to be harsher critics of each other’s bodies than men are. Instead of judging each other, let’s join together in sisterhood. Help your sisters see their unique beauty, rather than pointing out their flaws. If we stop criticizing and start supporting each other, we can help each other accept our bodies just as they are.

We have the opportunity to create  a new sexual revolution that celebrates each other’s differences. You don’t have to conform to one ideal of beauty in order to be beautiful—be your own Brand of Sexy. We are all beautiful in our own way.

If you can’t stop criticizing the way you look, consider the possibility that you have a problem. It isn’t good for you to be so hard on yourself. It undermines your confidence. There are conditions that can cause this kind of critical thinking, and there are treatments that can help. Please visit my How To Find A Therapist page for more information.

How do you feel about your body? Has anyone made harsh remarks about your body? What was your reaction?  I’d love to hear from you.  Please share your comments below and on Facebook and Twitter.

You can do this.  Join the revolution.  Be your own Brand of Sexy and get what you want.

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  • Tina says:

    Hi, I used to be a size 3 and then after kids I gained and just kept gaining now I’m a size 22 last I checked. I’m so very unhappy with the way I look there are times I don’t want to get out of bed. I mean what’s the sense right? I’ve had family say rude remarks to me especially a sister that always has been rude. I just want to lose weight, get healthy and feel better about me! I’m miserable 😢

    • Dr. Susan says:

      Hi Tina,

      Thanks for getting in touch.

      Accepting where you are in life isn’t always easy, is it?

      The thing is, it’s pretty hard to start changing your situation until you can accept it.

      If you don’t want to get out of bed, it makes me concerned that you might also be depressed.

      Depression can make the weight loss journey even harder.

      It’s a good idea for you to consider making your situation easier by getting some help.

      One good thing about COVID-19 is the availability of online help for these kinds of problems.

      A lot of insurance companies wouldn’t cover these types of online services before and now they do.

      Even without insurance, you can get some help.

      Here’s some info on how to find someone to help you.

      Congratulations for taking that first step toward changing your life!

      Please keep us posted on your progress.

      Dr. Susan

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