When you’re on a first date, you might be a little nervous. Will he like me? Does this have a future? Is he going to break my heart? It’s natural to be uncertain about where things stand. But there are some questions you should not ask when you first meet a man if you want a second date.
You don’t want to grill the poor guy with personal questions on your first date. Many men complain that their dates feel more like an interrogation than a pleasant meeting with an interesting woman. The problem is a lot of women want answers fast when they are nervous. But there is no need to make him feel uncomfortable. Why sabotage your chances of getting to know him? Take your time on date 1 so you can have future dates to find out the answers.
Here are the 7 questions you should never ask a man on your first date:
Don’t Ask This Question on Your First Date #1: Why Are You Still Single?
You may have the best of intentions by asking this question when it’s along the lines of, “You’re so great. Why are you single?” Still, you are putting him on the defensive and it may feel critical. After all, it implies that there is something wrong with being single. Think about it this way: how do you feel when you are asked this question?
Don’t Ask This Question on Your First Date #2: Why Did Your Last Relationship End?
This question is a little nosy for a first date. You just met him and he may not feel comfortable sharing this story with you. The gory details of his breakup are very personal and might be painful. Why not keep your first date more on the fun and light side?
Don’t Ask This Question on Your First Date #3: Where Do You See This Relationship Going?
This question is premature. He just met you so there is no way he has an answer to where you two are headed. When you ask this question, you can look a little desperate and in a rush. Meanwhile, he might feel annoyed by being put on the spot.
Don’t Ask This Question on Your First Date #4: How Do You Feel About Marriage?
First dates are all about deciding if you want a second date. You want to keep them upbeat and light. When you ask about marriage, you are trying to bring your date to a place of commitment, and he’s probably not ready to go there yet, making you look desperate and needy.
Don’t Ask This Question on Your First Date #5: Do You Want to Have Kids?
Of course, you might not want to waste a lot of time with a man who doesn’t want what you want. The problem is, you could push a man away with this question if you are more interested in his view on kids than in getting to know who he is as a person. Wait until you know him for a while.
Don’t Ask This Question on Your First Date #6: How Much Money Do You Make?
Talking about what he does for a living is a normal date conversation. But, asking him how much money he makes, crosses the line into highly personal information. Your date may be concerned that you are more interested in his money than who he is as a person.
Don’t Ask This Question on Your First Date #7: How Is Your Relationship with Your Parents?
This could be a difficult subject for him to discuss if there is friction or he has lost his parents. He might be concerned that you are screening him because you won’t be OK if there are any issues. Again, this question is too personal for a first date. Better to find out about his parents when he knows you better and is comfortable sharing it with you.
Keep your first date light and upbeat. Better to get to know your dates as real people than as someone to screen to see if they meet your criteria.