You’ve just started dating a new man and you are curious if there’s a way to tell if he’s still dating other women.
It’s normal and perfectly acceptable for the two of you to be seeing other people until you have a talk that defines your relationship as exclusive. In fact, you probably want to keep your options open until then. You want to get to know him to make sure he’s worth taking yourself off the market, and you can’t really tell that in a date or two.
Why does this matter?
One study found that 20% of married couples engage in extra-relational affairs. The rates are even higher for unmarried couples – up to 70%. Another study says that 44% of unmarried couples engage in extra-relational affairs.
Many women ignore obvious signs that the man they are dating is still dating other women. A man can say all the right things, but actions speak louder than words.
You must pay attention to the details that give you a clue to how he truly feels.
Instead of giving him the benefit of the doubt, listen to your instincts. If something feels off, trust your feelings.
A woman’s intuition is her superpower, so don’t second guess yourself and say you are being too picky or critical. Take your concerns seriously and be honest with yourself.
Have you ever seen any of these signs and ignored them?
Warning Sign He’s Dating Other Women #1: He Avoids the Exclusivity Talk
Sure, either of you can bring this topic up, but if you take things slow, ideally he will want to get a commitment from you so that you won’t be dating other people. You hope he will want to get you off the market so that he can have you all to himself. If he isn’t doing that, he may be content to have you and see others at the same time. In this case, he doesn’t want to move your relationship forward.
Always assume you are not exclusive unless you have this talk.
Warning Sign He’s Dating Other Women #2: He Is Missing on Saturday Night
If he isn’t asking you out on Saturday night, then he is likely seeing someone else and he is making her more of a priority than you. Saturday night is the official date night.
He might not ask you out for Saturday for a week or two when you first meet, but if several weeks go by and you don’t get moved up to Saturday night, it’s not a good sign.
If you want to be his priority, you may want to turn down dates for other nights to see if he moves you to Saturday or not.
Warning Sign He’s Dating Other Women #3: You Haven’t Met His People
If you haven’t met his friends or family, there is a reason. A man will usually want to introduce a special woman to the people in his life. Is he hiding you from them? It may be a sign that he may be seeing others and is not certain you are the one for him.
Warning Sign He’s Dating Other Women #4: He Avoids Discussing Relationships
A man in a solid relationship is willing to talk about potential future plans or discuss your relationship or relationships in general. If your sixth sense is picking up on his discomfort with relationships, listen to it.
Does he change the subject, make a negative remark, or just look uncomfortable? He may be seeing other women.
Warning Sign He’s Dating Other Women #5: He Is Hiding Something
If you have a sense that he is hiding something from you, that is a red flag. Are you always hanging out at your place? Why doesn’t he want you to see his place? If he is reluctant to let you use his phone, is he afraid you will see texts from another woman?
He may have another life that he doesn’t want you to know about.
It’s ok to keep your options open when you just started dating someone, but at some point, you have to ask yourself: is he seeing other women too?
Have you ever seen any of these warning signs and ignored them?