With St. Patrick’s Day coming up, the idea of luck may be on your mind. If you are single, are you wondering when your luck is going to turn around in your love life? When will you meet “the one” for you?
Too often, we think that our happiness is all a matter of chance. Many of us think that love is often up to fate. We think things like “My friends are so lucky, because they all met great guys and got married. I only ever meet jerks,” or “I don’t have any luck with guys. It never seems to work out.”
This perspective sells yourself short, because it doesn’t acknowledge how much power you have to change your situation. With a little knowhow, you can turn your love life around! Here are 3 steps to improving your luck:
- Slow down. Women often say, “I have bad luck with guys” when they repeatedly find themselves with men who don’t treat them well. But if you slow down, you can get better at recognizing if he’s a quality guy. If you figure out that he’s not, you can walk away before you get too attached, and it won’t feel as painful. Then you free yourself up to meet men who will treat you well.
- Develop a growth mindset. A person with a fixed mindset believes that she’s stuck the way she is. A person with a growth mindset, on the other hand, believes she can grow, learn new skills, and develop new abilities. With a growth mindset, you will realize that finding love isn’t all about being in the right place at the right time. It’s also about knowing yourself well enough to make healthy dating decisions, effectively expressing your needs and wants, and recognizing which guys are worth your time. These are all skills you can learn!
- Invest time and energy into learning different dating strategies. Yes, there is some luck involved in dating. Some women do happen to bump into a great guy in the grocery store. But there is also a tremendous amount of skill and strategy, and if you devote the time and energy to learning those skills, you’ll significantly improve your luck. Even the women who are lucky enough to be asked out by Mr. Perfect in the produce aisle then use a lot of skill, self-awareness, and carefully-honed intuition to get from “Will you have dinner with me?” to “Will you marry me?” My book, Be Your Own Brand of Sexy: A New Sexual Revolution for Women, is chock-full of tips and strategies that can help you get what you want.
Instead of searching for a four-leafed clover, spend your time learning how to be your own Brand of Sexy. Being your own Brand of Sexy means figuring out what you want, what works for you as an individual, and what strategies will help you achieve your relationship goals, whatever they may be. It’s also important to be able to stand up for yourself. Not sure if you are being your own Brand of Sexy? Click here to take a quiz to find out!
Do you think finding love is more about luck or skill? I’d love to hear from you. Please share your experiences in the comments below and on Facebook and Twitter.
You can do this. Join the revolution. Be your own Brand of Sexy and get what you want.
