What is the Best Way to Meet a Man? Here are 5 Great Ones

1
Apr

“How can I meet a nice man?”

This is one of the most frequently asked questions I get when speaking to women on the radio, on TV, in public – everywhere.

Finding a Nice Man Can Be Hard

Unfortunately, countless women don’t realize that they aren’t very likely to meet someone by hanging out with their friends and family or sitting in front of the TV at home. It takes a lot more effort.

I hear, “It shouldn’t be that hard,” from many women about this situation. Maybe that’s true. But remember that finding a good relationship is worth the work involved. It’s the dating process that helps you get to know someone. You can’t start that process until you meet men.

Don’t expect to go from meeting a nice man to an instant relationship like in the movies. Real life is much more complicated. Dating is critical.

Depending on how things go, it can set the stage for your future relationship or end it quickly. It is how you figure out whether he’s a nice man who wants what you want or he isn’t. And no, you can’t usually tell these things in a date or two. So, learn to listen to your instincts and intuition so that you can better tell the nice men from the ones who could break your heart.

5 Solid Ways to Meet Mr. Right

Here are some suggestions for how to meet a nice man. All of these won’t work for everyone – make sure to choose the ways that are right for your situation.

1. Blind dates.

Will your friends fix you up? Let your friends know that you’re looking to meet any nice, eligible men that they see as a good match. Friends are good sources for men because they are already semi-vetted – if he is the friend of your friend, he is probably a decent guy.

2. Socialize through common interests.

Do you go to church, play a sport, or have hobbies where you can meet someone? Whether it’s the gym, classes, volunteering, or something else, wherever you spend your free time can be a great place to meet a man who shares some of your interests. Better still, if you don’t meet anyone, at least you spent your time doing something you like.

3. Throw a party or go to parties.

Why not have a party and encourage your guests to bring their single friends? A popular idea is to have a party where each of your female friends brings a single man to introduce to her other friends. You will hopefully meet some nice men at these singles parties.

Be aware that some of the men who attend could just be looking for a hookup or something casual. If you want a serious relationship, learn to tell the difference between the men who have potential and those who don’t.  The same guidelines apply when attending a friend’s party.

4. Meet people through your job (though maybe not at your place of work).

Dating a man at your current place of work can be tricky. Don’t even consider it if it’s against the rules or if there could be any legal issues (like either you or him being accused of harassment). If you can’t help yourself, it’s safer to date someone at your level or in a different department rather than your boss.

Luckily, there are several ways of finding a match who doesn’t actually work with you. Depending on the size of the company you work for, see if you can mingle with men in other departments, offices, or locations of your employer. Even if you’re self-employed, you can attend a conference, seminar, or class for your job; join networks or clubs that allow you to socialize with your colleagues at other companies.

Because of the unique problems dating at work could cause, be even more cautious than usual. Can you imagine how unpleasant it would be to see the man who broke your heart at work every day?

5. Online dating.

Online dating is one of the best ways to meet men. 30% of adults in the US have used dating sites or apps, and 39% of couples meet online.  If you still hesitate to look online for a man even after reading that statistic, you’re not alone. It is a little more complicated than meeting a man at a party.

You need a good online profile, good pictures, and a game plan. Unfortunately, romance scammers have found dating websites to be an ideal spot to cheat Americans. Their elaborate hoaxes typically involve a series of sweet-talking emails from a man who appears to be handsome, successful, and working in another country. Their geographic undesirability (which they may say is temporary) gives them a built-in excuse for why you can’t meet to check out their lies. And eventually they ask you for money.

Don’t get emotionally attached to a scammer, even if you never give him a penny. You can waste a lot of time and emotional energy and be left with a lot of frustration if not heartache. Know that if a man isn’t ready to meet after 3-4 emails, he’s probably hiding something.  Stop writing him back to protect your heart and your pocketbook. Look at your real dating prospects.

Your next success steps

How do you meet a nice man?

Try these methods.

Your biggest challenge is: Will you take action?

How do you expect to make any progress if you do nothing?

Anything in this article that seems even remotely possible is a potential next step. Try several ways. The more you try, the more men you’ll meet and the more likely you will eventually meet Mr. Right.

Make a commitment. Tell us what steps you will take to meet some new men. Leave us a message. We love to hear from you.

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Comments

  • Rebecca says:

    I am 63, single widow since 2006, and haven’t had any relationship or date or man since, 2 years ago I started to want to meet a good man, but They all seem so shy! I always have to start a conversation, i can tell right away if he is the one. I don’t drive, on monthly S.S. Widows Benefits which isn’t much. So I don’t get out much, if i do it may be the casino once a month, maybe a bar once a month with my girl friend. I feel like i will never have love again and I feel like i am too old, a man doesn’t want a woman my age, he wants that younger female! Only place left for me I guess, is if I go shopping for a way older man then me at the nursing home or retirement home lol! I am about to give up all hope of ever finding him!

    • Dr. Susan says:

      Hi Rebecca,

      I’m sorry I missed your message earlier.

      Sometimes it’s best not to start conversations with men you don’t know. Maybe they aren’t interested.

      Maybe you just aren’t meeting the men who want relationships.

      Why not set up an online dating profile? watch out for scammers, and don’t meet anyone unless he sounds really nice.

      Warmly,

      Dr. Susan

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